Making a New Years’s resolution and then actually doing it is such a rewarding and satisfying feeling – but isn’t that the case anytime we achieve one of our goals??
A New Year’s resolution is after all a goal that is made at the start of the year. What might be stopping you achieve this goal, might also be stopping you from achieving other goals in your life too.
Here’s a quick example. You make a resolution to get fit. So you buy a six month membership at a gym. What do you do when you resolution is to go to the gym and then after 6 months you have used one month of your very expensive membership? My biggest question to you is, did you spend most of the 1st month comparing yourself with everyone else? Did you spend the time you did have at the gym telling yourself you are fat or feeling like a weakling compared to everyone else?
We have so many thoughts that race through our heads every single day. Apparently it can be anywhere between 50,000 and 70,000 thoughts a day . Most of them are automatic, unconscious and if you did an inventory you might find them focused on self-criticism and self-deprecation. It is like we have taken every single negative or critical thing anyone has said or done to us over the years and decided to play them on repeat over and over again. As Dr Phil says…”How’s that working for you?”
I am not sure about you, but I am yet to find a single person to have every criticised themselves into liking and accepting who they are. Neither has anyone gotten better at something by telling themselves they couldn’t do it, that they are useless, or stupid.
Have you ever received a complement from someone and said “thanks, but….”? Then you followed it up with a put down of yourself.
Have you ever been validated for a job well done and you followed it up with all the things that went wrong and what you wish you had done differently instead?
A bit of simple advice – JUST STOP IT!!!!!!!!
You now want to yell back – BUT HOW?????
Sometimes you might just need a little professional support. When we want financial advice we go to an expert without question. What if it’s our thinking that is stopping us from achieving our resolutions? This is particularly important if you are dealing with a long-term issue, ie smoking, drinking, finance issues, weight issues, getting a promotion, etc. The way you think might be getting in the way of your goals.
If you are interested in taking the next step and making lasting changes in your life, Lifeline can offer face-to-face support. Counselling is not about crisis alone rather it is about taking the step to seek support when you want to make a change but are not sure how. Asking for help is both courageous and SMART.
Lifeline is available 24/7 on 13 11 14 for those in crisis. Face to Face appointments in Darwin, including on a Saturday morning are available by calling 89356400